Mommy IS My Profession

I do not like filling out those long forms at doctor's offices.  That is definately one of the bummers about having cancer.

On most days, I remember to write my married name. Yea, even after 25 years of marriage on a frazzled day I might write my maiden name.  I've even spelled my name wrong - more than once. On a good day, I can even rattle down my address and phone number without hesitation. The six kids' names and birthdays?  Another trick question.  Just because I don't remember their birthday and the year they were born doesn't mean I'm a bad mommy, does it?

DOES IT?


The worst line to fill out is occupation.  After reading one of those email forward things years ago about the value of a mom, I started putting down Domestic Engineer. 

Then, I decided I don't need to come up with a fancy, impressive sounding title to try to make myself look better.  I'm proud of my profession.  So now I write down, boldly and proudly, MOMMY.  I am a Stay At Home Mommy.

I've seen eyebrows raised, but not heard any feedback.

However, sometimes when the paperwork gets back to me, I've noticed they've changed my occupation to UNEMPLOYED.  Unemployed means you're not working.  I work every minute I'm awake.  Even if I'm sitting, I'm refereeing disagreements, listening to hear who didn't flush the toilet,  trying to remember how old the milk really is, and wondering if there is any chocolate still hidden in the house somewhere.

Mommies even work when they should be sleeping, taking children poddy, giving drinks, soothing nightmares, stopping sleepwalkers and all those other things nocturnal offspring like to experience just the moment you are finally in REM sleep.

I will not be swayed, I still put MOMMY down for my occupation.
Imagine my delight to receive something in the mail honoring me in my chosen profession.  No, I didn't get Mother of the Year. I think you have to have matching clothes, a clean house, consistently call your kids by their correct names and make dinner more than once a week to qualify for that.  I was asked to represent my city at a glamorous conference for the NAPW.


I was hoping you would ask.  National Association of Professional Women.


I was SO impressed!  They finally are acknowledging that being a Mommy is a Professional Career!

For a split second, I was considering joining Ivanka Trump at the Waldorf Astoria for the First Annual NAPW Conference to benefit from the "exclusive and powerful networking forum"  and to "achieve social and career development."  I was wondering if all that networking would provide a powerful cure for diaper rash, a newly developed recipe for homemade playdoh or see if anybody has an exclusive idea for making a craft out of dryer fuzz.

However, going out in public for powerful networking with Ivanka  means I would have to have matching clothes, remember to pronunciate and spell my entire name, and talk in complete sentences. I'd be once again defending my claim that being a MOMMY is a profession to high-heeled lawyers and polished real-estate agents.

I think  I'll stay home and  experience that "exclusive and powerful networking forum" by playing dress-ups with child #6 and the neighbor kids.

After that, to "achieve social and career development," we'll pull out the dryer fuzz from the dryer, grab some glue, pipe cleaners, jingle bells and pom-poms and get busy creating my own craft idea.

After all, that's what I do best. 

I'm a Professional Mommy, ya' know.

Six Million Dollar Momma

I discovered this weekend that  Ann Crittendon, author of The Price of Motherhood,  put a price tag on motherhood - a million dollars.

That is the amount of money a stay at home mom (SAHM) will lose after only having one child by forfeiting a salary, stocks, retirement savings, pension and other benefits.

When I grew up there was a TV show called The Bionic Woman and she was the female version of The Six Million Dollar Man.

Since I have six kids, doesn't that make me a Six Million Dollar Woman?

I was astounded at the cost sacrificed for my career choice, Motherhood, but had I known this 23 years ago when I gave birth to child #1,  I wouldn't have made the decision any differently.

I don't stay home for financial reasons.

Although I home school and feel strongly about my children's education, and some statistics show children of SAHMs do better in school and in testing, I don't stay home for educational reasons.

I am a SAHM for two reasons. (follow link to previous post)



1. The Bible

Titus 2: 3-5

The aged women... teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children,

To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.


I cannot reason these verses away. As a young single woman, I felt strongly about obeying the Lord and being a keeper at home when He granted me children. Since the Bible doesn't change, neither have my convictions.


2. I love my children and want to be with them.



I didn't read any books about the benefits of being a SAHM.  I don't need to justify myself or prove my value to others.

I can give my own statistics.

I was there when all six of my children rolled over for the first time, crawled for the first time, sat up for the first time and walked for the first time. I cheered like a maniac, never tiring of watching their accomplishments in life.

I marked their language progress with joy and great amounts of over-exaggerated lip movements as I tried to help them form their words more correctly.

I wore great amounts of baby food, milk and juice while teaching my children how to eat and eventually feed themselves. If I wear food now, it's slopped there with my own clumsy hands.

I was the one they wanted to tuck them in at night. I was the one who heard their secrets when they finally learned how to tell one.

All the firsts, except the naughty ones they got away with at the time, I WAS THERE.

I. was. there.


Yea, SAHMs may not always get a lot of adult interaction.

Yea, SAHMs may sometimes miss their career or wonder what they could have been had they stayed working.

Yea, SAHMs may sometimes be wiping up puke or washing the same dishes over and over and wonder why they went to college.

Yea, SAHMs may sometimes feel a little awkward about not having any of their "own" money to spend and/or a little guilty about not contributing to the bank account.

Yea, SAHMs may experience the typical frustrations, disappointments, shocks, trials and stresses that may make us doubt our value or our choice.

When I look in my kids' eyes, the windows to their precious souls, I know these light trials cannot shake me off the path of obedience.

Yes, it WAS a million dollar decision to stay at home with my kids, because you couldn't have paid me a million dollars to be away from them all day.

I value being a keeper at home because I value my children.

So, as I begin another new week, weak and weary from a trying year, I am thankful to remind myself why I am at home, as a SIX MILLION DOLLAR MOMMA.

*****

Needing to Make Your Home Sing this Monday? 

Pop over to Nan's blog and see how other Moms are beginning their week.

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Need some motivation this Monday?

Swing by the Fifth Street Mama's blog for a dose.

*****

"I Wish I Made Enough Money….

….to stay at home with my children."



I was standing in the line of a grocery store in Kansas. I had just spent almost two hours shopping with my three little children, because I had a pile of coupons, a week of meals to make and $35 to spend.  It was the early 90's. Even with lower grocery prices, it wasn't a lot of money.

I STARED in disbelief. I couldn't believe her guilt would cause her to speak  with such sarcastic false humility without knowing my circumstances.

In a glance I noticed her heavily jeweled, manicured fingers, her expensive, matching (AND minus baby throw-up) clothing, her unscuffed high heels, nylons, her makeup, her purse. I took it all in. She might "need" to work, but I knew she spent a lot of money, if that one heavily accessorized outfit was any indication of her spending habits. She looked beautiful, but she wasn't happy.

I didn't want to blab my husband's salary out, but he was a teacher in a private Christian school and we were paying 1/4 of our salary to student loans. I was pretty sure our monthly salary was easily what they made in a week.

I polished my own fingernails.
My husband trimmed my hair and I had only 1 perm in 10 years.  (for the fashion of this decade, this was a sacrifice.)
I wore only hand-me downs and thrift store items.
I had never purchased anything new for my kids to wear at this point in my life.
I bought nylons once a year and washed them by hand to make them last.
I used the cheapest make-up and hair products I could find.
I sewed some of my kids' clothes from $1 a yard fabric.

I don't remember my exact words, but after processing the absurdity of her speculation, I let her know it was a spiritual decision to stay at home, not a financial one. I let her know we were choosing to raise our kids according to the Bible.

The cashier was a little more honest as she entered the conversation about my SAHM status.

"I don't stay at home with my kids, cuz I couldn't stand to. I mean, I love my kids, but they drive me crazy. When they're home at the holidays, I can hardly wait until they go back to school. But, you're a much more patient person, that's good that you stay at home with your kids. You're such a good mom."

I didn't stay at home because I was patient, either, although I appreciated her kind comment.

I have always been a Stay At Home Mom because I believe the Bible teaches it.

As a new believer, 18 and in college, I was searching for all those big answers in life. I remember rejoicing to discover that the Bible covered topics such as marriage, parenting, worrying, working and church structure. I diligently searched for answers, and the Lord graciously had already supplied them. It gave me guidance for decisions concerning my future.

Titus 2:3-5
"The aged women ... teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed."

As much as that woman's comment went deep into my soul, I wasn't angered, I was offended, I wasn't defensive. I was sad for her.

I also stay at home because I love my kids and want to be with them.

All those sacrifices were, and continue to be,  worth it. I NEVER look back and think about what I couldn’t buy, the plain food we ate, or the inexpensive clothing we wore. The Lord provided sufficiently and we were joyously happy in the Lord's work and content with what He had provided.
I look back and cherish holding those babies.  I remember staring in their precious little faces, trying to imprint it on my mind and heart, knowing that each day they changed and grew.

I cherish being the one to see every first in their life.

I cherish the sweet memoring of playing with them, sleeping in tents with them, and teaching them them to craft, to cook, to sew, to paint, to create, to read, to garden, to ride a bike, jump rope, do a cartwheel, play games, cut with scissors...

I hugged and kissed  them every day. I looked into their eyes. I talked to them about the Savior. I read the Bible to them. I read books to them.

I cherished them.

Now, I cherish the memories when they were young and sometimes weep that those busy years are now fleeting memories.  When I see a young mom with all her little ones filling up her grocery cart, I am a little wistfully jealous.  I miss those years, because I loved being with all my children.
Today, I wonder about  that jeweled woman, who spoke with bitter jealousy, and what memories she revisits.

Somehow, I think she also looks back on her life  and weeps.

But, my heart tells me,  her tears are tears of regret.

"Lord, I just pray for this dear woman who impacted my life and heart so many years ago. I long for her to have peace and joy and slavation.  I ask you to comfort her, to hear her cries and answer her prayers.  Bless her, Lord.  Amen."




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