Plans for an Unplanned Journey

Six years ago, we left 40 years of midwest living  and moved to the westcoast. 

It was a planned journey.

Very planned.

We packed, organized, gave away things.

We sold our house and arranged to rent a new one. 
I returned all my friends' Tupperwares,

my daughters returned their friends' clothes.

We even returned our library books.

I bought snacks and presents for the trip.

I packed special surprises into some of the boxes.

We enjoyed going away parties.

We gave and received presents from friends.

I made list after list,

determined to have no surprises,

no stone unturned.

I wanted the moving journey to be an adventure, an experience,

 a life-changing and faith-growing time for our family.

I knew planning well would accomplish this in our lives.

Six months after settling into our new destination,

we began another journey.

An unplanned journey.

A journey of faith.

My journey with thyroid cancer.

My friend, Kirsti, "gave" this verse to me in a card.  I clung to the promise, 

so as I approach another phase of the journey,

 I bought a plaque for my desk for a daily reminder.

It's a journey that may have rests along the way,

but no immediate end in view.

I know one sure cure for cancer,

but I am not ready to die yet.  :)

In October, I was given the word remission,

but I knew it was more of an emotional break my doctor knew I needed.

Two weeks ago I had my routine follow-up bloodwork.

Some numbers weren't what they should be.

Not drastic, but not good, not what they need to be to fight cancer

 and to assure I don't have cancer growing in my body.

Today, my husband is accompanying me to the hospital for further testing. 

I will be getting a chest x-ray, a sonogram on the lumps on my neck (they just never all go away)

and  a PET/CT scan.

Because my cancer has metasticized twice already,

 there has always been the concern it would return to other areas,

like the chest.

Part of me just never wants to worry about anything, just deal with it as it comes.

Another part of me knows that I can't go into something unprepared.

I need to plan.

I think of these times of unknowing as my Gethsemene times.

I am waiting in the Garden,

knowing what I could be facing,

but saying

"Not my will, O Lord, but thine."

But, I do pray for healing.

So, I plan for the journey.

I plan to be prospered,

to not be harmed,

 to be given a hope and a future.

Because, I want the cancer journey to be an adventure, an experience,

a life-changing and faith-growing time for our our family.

Because, I know His plans will accomplish this in our lives.

Halleluia, we serve a wonderful God!

Praise Him with me today!