It's the Little Things that Count

Several times a year, my husband takes me to a writing conference

to learn the craft and meet published and aspiring writers.

He makes arrangements at a nice hotel,

we eat at restaurants,

and enjoy a weekend get-away.

This past weekend we were in Portland

to hear Clint Kelly keynote for the Oregon Christian Writers.

Sometimes, I still get this

"pinch me, it can't be real" sensation

when I'm in a fancy, grown-up situation.

Ya' know, we're still pretty much

Red Necks

at heart.

Despite the presence of the Concierge in the foyer,

(that's FOY-AY, if you've watched Princess Diaries)

the Valet at the door to park your car and open your door,

(I'm not a feminist, I let them open the door for me)

and the fanciness all around,

that's not what makes my heart go pitter-patter.

It's those little things that make me happy.

Believe it or not,

this was really thrilling to me.

It was like an extra special welcome to my hotel room.

I had to pull it out and see how it was done.

Impressive.

I worried,  wondering if it was considered

"wasting toilet paper"

if I threw away the accordion piece instead of using it.

Don't tell my parents, k?

Raising six kids on a teacher's and a secretary's schedule,

they had to have financial guidelines for the house,

including strict rules about how much tp we could use.

The pattern was repeated with a washcloth and hand towel on the tub.

Yea, I'm pretty simple to be enthralled with these details.

My muse on these little things began taking a shape

of its own, when I began thinking about my life.

It's also

The Little Things 

 that thrill our families.

It's easy to think life is about the big moments,

the extensive family vacations,

the expensive presents,

planned holiday celebrations and

bigger homes and newer cars.

When I listen to my older kids talk,

their favorite memories are usually mundane

occurrences that didn't even register in my memory bank.

A quick survey made this list.

The kids love ~

*Mom or Dad acting out of character

*playing Spoons

*snowmobiling

*family dinners

*building snow forts

*family roller-blading adventures

*trips to Tastee Freeze

*4-wheeling

They didn't mention anything related to money,

getting what they wanted for birthdays and Christmases,

big purchases or any of the trips we've taken.

The two main ingredients in all their favorite memories?

1. The whole family participated.

2. Everyone was happy.

My husband doesn't collect anything,

doesn't want anything,

never needs anything.

Coming up with gifts for this man is hard,

but living with him on a daily basis is easy.

For him,

it's always

The Little Things That Count.

He loves ~

*his scalp scratched, nothing relaxes him more

than having my fingers run through his hair

*when I call him at work just to say "I love you"

not

 "dwanna' know whatcher' naughty kids just did?"

*being complimented

*when I repeat things I've learned from him

After 25 years of marriage

and 24 years of parenting,

I still remind myself what's important.

When life gets faster and busier,

it's easy to say NO to  little things.

Sometimes I think I'm too busy to

go for walks,

sit around the table after dinner to talk,

play games or

watch a movie.

But, that little thing 

 might become one of their favorite memories.

I want my kids to look back on these moments

we've shared as a family with the same I awe I had

when I beheld the accordion folded toilet paper.

It's The Little Things That Count.

Family Togetherness

When the kids were younger,

it was easy to find an activity the whole family enjoyed.

 Hours were spent playing board games,

building forts, playing restaurant, raft,

legos, duplos......

We played family games of kickball,

a game that requires more enthusiasm than skill.

We would inline skate,

the kids following Scott and I like ducklings on wheels.

As they aged,

and a few ventured into their teens,

it was more challenging to choose group activities

that would nuture

Family Togetherness.

Suddenly, instead of a bunch of "little kids"

we had a group that included

teens,

pre-teens,

elementary kids,

and one toddler.

During these years we started camping and enjoying water activities.

Educational activities and museums become part of the routine.

We started soliciting opinions

and allowing the older kids to help plan the family outings.

Through the years,

we've discovered there's one thing we all love.

A good fire and good conversation.

I guess that's two things.

We enjoy those quiet moments of sitting together around fire,

warmed not just by the fire,

but by the loving relationships.

OK, the kids probably don't think that,

but I do.

When the family trampoline was bounced into the trash pile,

we knew exactly what we wanted to fill in the spot~

a place to gather,

a place to visit,

a place to just be together.

OK, the kids may be there just for the S'Mores,

but I know someday,

they won't be thinking about the sugary treat,

they'll be thinking about the sweetness

of growing up in a loving family that greatly enjoyed

 Family Togetherness.