Secrets Revealed, Loneliness Healed

On Friday, I let you know I had a secret.

My husband had kept a secret from me,

and he's usually not good about doing that.

If he buys a really good present,

he can't wait until the holiday to give it to me.

He giggles and dances around like a little boy

who is expecting to get a present.

Except, he loves to give.

Wednesday, around noon, I had just finished homeschooling.

I was multi-tasking on the computer and the phone.

I heard a knock on the door and

Beka raced to open it.

I am over protective.

A strange man had been in my driveway about 30 minutes earlier,

and I didn't want Beka to answer the door alone.

I chased her down the hallway, trying to get her to be quiet,

telling her we didn't even have to answer the door.

Since we weren't expecting anybody,

it was too soon for neighbor kids to play,

I explained  it had to be a salesman.

The knocking persisted.

I finally answered the door, with phone still in hand.

There stood my oldest daughter, Jana, her husband, Aaron,

and their two little monkeys, Brookelyn and Brayden,

who had flown in from California.

I kinda' said, "HI," all casual, 

but secretly trying to remember if I had forgotten their visit.

When I finally figured out it was a SURPRISE

I started screaming and crying.

They had video footage to prove it.

Thursday night, we took Jana and her husband out for coffee,

but it ended up being a trip to the airport to pick up Daniel,

the second born who lives in North Dakota.

My "Six of One, Half Dozen of the Other" were all together,

for the first time in several years.

Other than being puked on,

the worst thing about parenting is when they move out.

Well, I guess moving back in after moving out is more challenging,

but that's another blog.

I just miss my crazy kids.

I really, really, really miss my kids.

This is just our children,

we left out the son-in-law, (photographer)

and the sleeping grandkids.

With work and nap schedules,

it was challenging to find a time to take group pics.

The motto in our family is

"You Wake 'Em, You Take 'Em,"

so nobody wanted to wake up the Crazy Babies,

even for pictures.

A can of Pirouette Cookies became a comedy routine.

As you could see on Friday,

my house isn't clean when all the kids are home,

and it isn't quiet.

But it is the most beautiful mess and noise for a mom.

We had our own Thanksgiving Dinner on Friday,

cooked by my children.

I got to set the table.

That's my favorite part of a meal.

As we gathered around together,

laughing, sharing and thanking the Lord

for His goodness to His children,

our hearts were so full of love and gratitude.

We've already made one trip to the airport,

to return Dan to his regular life.

Jana and her family will leave today.

I will start a new week missing my kids.

Really, really missing my kids.

But I will choose to rejoice, because,

my children are all serving the Lord where He has called them.

My prayers can follow them,

guide them,

encourage them,

uphold them.

3 John 1:4
I have no greater joy

 than to hear

that my children

 walk in truth.

That's the only balm for a Mommie's achy heart and empty arms.

*****

Not a Mini-Me

This blog was inspired after reading my daughter's blog, an honest reflection about the ways she's like me and the ways she isn't.

I realized we've been tugging on opposite sides of this struggle in life from the very beginning.

The best advice my Lamaze coach gave me when I was pregnant with my first child had nothing to do with labor, contractions or breathing.

It had to do with the appearance of our newborn children.  She shared her story of expecting a petite, dark-haired little girl, a little miniature of herself.  Instead, she had a chubby, red-headed little boy with freckles.  She adored her little guy, but was in shock because he didn't look anything like her or anybody else on either side of the family.

She warned us, "Have no expectations about what your child is going to look like." 

I have thought about this over and over -  her wisdom has permeated many aspects of my life, whether she intended it to or not.

Not only did my first child come out with hair and skin so dark I would have thought they handed me the wrong baby if I hadn't been awake for the whole thing, but as she grew,  I realized she didn't always think like me, either.

I learned to have no expectations.

From a young age, I learned she had her own ideas in life about the world around her.  She didn't see the world through my eyes, she saw it through her own.

It wasn't wrong, it wasn't rebellion, she wasn't rejecting me.

She just wasn't a little Mini-Me.

She didn't follow my exact taste in clothes, decorating,  or crafts.  She didn't like sewing.  She didn't like museums. She didn't like camping. 

As I learned to let go of my ideas on how things should look, should function and should be, I was blessed to see her own taste, confidence and faith develop. 

This was a valuable lesson to learn, since she was the first of six children.  

I am not raising children to be imitators of me, I am raising children who were knit together in my womb by the Heavenly Father, who created them with their own personalities, gifts and abilities.

If they are to imitate anybody completely, it should be the Lord Jesus.  Our example is supposed to point them to Him.

1 Corinthians 11:1

Imitate me,

just as I also imitate Christ..

Jana and I celebrating her gradution from High School

at the top of the Space Needle.

She doesn't like this picture of herself,

but I think she is beautiful.

Jana likes this picture, but I don't like the picture of myself.

We still don't always agree.

Even though I tried to not conform her into my image,

and even though she tried not to be just like me,

we ended up a lot more alike that we ever imagined.

Ya' know what?

We're both really, really happy about that.

3 John 1:4

I have no greater joy

 than to hear

that my children walk in truth.

Daddy Ears, Mommy Ears, God Ears

Daddy's hear-
*the bell on the ice cream truck
*a car that needs power steering fluid
*a car that needs to adjust their timing belt
*a 747 in the air
*his name after repeated for  the fourth time
*exactly what a wife is SAYING not FEELING

Mommy hears -
*the creak of a hinge to the cupboard that contains the snacks
*the click of a remote that is changing the tv away from the agreed station
*the whispered threat of an older kids to a younger kid
*the muffled scraping of the cookie jar lid being put back into place
*the untwisting of a cellophane candy wrapper, especially if it is after brushing teeth, but before bedtime
*the shaking of a piggy bank
*the opening of the fridge door
*the opening of any door, especially after bedtime
*the cry of a child during the night
*the whimper of a child during the night
*the sniffle of a child during the night
*the unusual breathing pattern of a child during the night
*the blinking eyes of a child awakened during the night


Kids hear-
*the untwisting of a cellophone candy wrapper, even if mom is hiding in the closet of her bedroom
*the jangle of change in a Daddy's pocket
*everything their friends say
*the ice cream truck
*the crinkle of dollar bills in Mommy's wallet
*everything Daddy says



If you're the kind of wife I am, you might chide (sounds better than nag, huh?) your hubby for not listening.

We chide the kids for not listening.
We long to have our voices heard.

Maybe that's why we blog.
Someone, somewhere, is listening.
(Technically, yes, reading, but it has the same result as real listening!)

The Lord has this same longing for people on earth to listen to Him.

Matthew 13:9, "He who has ears to hear, let him hear."

We all know there is a difference between letting the words enter the eardrum AND listening and engaging with the heart and mind.  The Lord knows the difference, too.

Sixteen times in the New Testament the He says,  "let him hear." 

He speaks through His Son, the Lord Jesus Christ.

Matthew 17:5, "While he was still speaking, behold, a bright cloud overshadowed them; and suddenly a voice came out of the cloud, saying, “This is My beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased. Hear Him!”
 
 
He speaks through His Word, the Bible.

Luke 11:28, "But He said, “More than that, blessed are those who hear the word of God and keep it!”

 He wants us to hear Him, but He is listening to us, as well.  This is what He wants to hear.

3 John 1:4, "I have no greater joy than to hear that my children walk in truth."



We walk in the truth because we hear His voice.  We've come full circle.


Our longing for our husband and children to hear us should be a spiritual reminder of same desire the Lord has for us.


"Are you listening?"

Out of the Mouth of Babes

This year I've had the privilege of teaching my sixth child to read.  Watching that lightbulb go on when they translate the phonics lessons into reading is an amazing experience. 

Reading is so exciting because if you can read,

you can travel anywhere you want,

you can meet anyone you want, dead or alive,

you can learn anything you want to learn,

you can experience anything you want to experience.

Even greater than the privilege  of teaching my children to read, is the privilege of teaching my children about the Lord Jesus Christ and the Bible.

As I teach them simple truths from the Bible--

The Lord loves us,

He hears our prayers,

He speaks to us through the Bible,

His Son died for our sins--

These truths blossom in their hearts and their childish worship brings glory and honor to the Lord.

And when these two great teaching privileges entwine you have a glorious result:

Beka's First Poem

3 John 1:4

I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth.

Psalm 8:2

Out of the mouth of babes...

You have ordained praise,

Matthew 18:2-4
Then Jesus called a little child to Him...and said, “unless you are converted and become as little children, you won't enter the kingdom of heaven.  Whoever humbles himself as this little child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven."


Isn't that the end result we ALL want -- to be in Heaven with the God "who is very, very good and He is love?"