Wednesday, July 14, 2010

It's That Time Again

It's that time again.


I had my six month routine blood work
to find out the status of the cancer
that has staked a claim on my body
with squatter's rights.
In a few weeks, I will have a sonogram.

I always feel a little apprehensive,
so I commit my concerns to the Lord in prayer,
and try not to take it back out of His hands with worry.

But, I always know,
that little band-aid on my arm,
could be the beginning of another life change for me.

As I was leaving, my endocrinologist cheered me on,
as she is good at doing,
by complimenting
"You're such a brave young woman."

The good news is, 
she thinks I am young.

But, the brave part,
I'm not sure about.
I appreciate her warmth and her encouragement,
but I am not brave.

I just have cancer.

People with bravery
rescue other people from drowning and car wrecks.
Brave people jump out of airplanes,
climb Mount Everest,
 live in the jungles as a missionary,
and walk on the moon.

I am not brave by character,
my situation forces bravery
because the only alternative
to living with cancer,
if you can't be cured,
is dying with it.

So, if that is all it takes to be brave,
I hope she calls me brave for
many,
many,
many years.
I would like to someday be a
"brave, old woman."

So, my heart and mind are swirling
with prayers and scenarios,
as I consider what the future might hold,
because,


it's that time again.


6 comments:

  1. Don't forget, He's coming back! Some of us may get to meet Him a little earlier, is all :-)
    I think bravery is taking up the challenge. You are an inspiration in the way you do that. God bless you and give you peace and strength.

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  2. It takes "being brave" to bare your soul and share your heart and feelings about it.

    It takes "being brave" to put one step forward - day after day - for your friends and most importantly your family.

    I agree... You are one brave young woman. You're inspiring...

    Your faith is amazing. And, I think its in knowing WHO and WHERE your strength comes from. He is the BRAVE one - over all.

    We'll be praying you, your results, and peace to overwhelm you and yours. With Love,
    ~B

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  3. It takes bravery to face the inevitable with peace and joy.

    Now the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that ye may abound in hope, through the power of the Holy Ghost.

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  4. Praying for you. Sympathizing with you. Hoping with you that I'm brave for many, many years, and feeling anything but brave. :-) I love you!

    ps, I have a couple of more months before I have to face the needle again. :-)

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  5. Thanks for all the spoken and unspoken prayers and encouragements. The love and encouragement of friends, family and bloggers has given strength for the day and bright hope for tomorrow.

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  6. Praying for you and your family right now!
    Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.-John 14:27

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